Today marked my last time preaching as a staff member at Monte Vista Chapel. I wasn’t sure how I would feel when this day arrived. I decided to walk into the day without expectations. It held a few surprises.
1. After the service Lorna and I stationed ourselves in the courtyard to speak with people on their way out of church. People stopped by and said the kindest things to us. It made us feel well loved cared for and appreciated. One person who stopped by commented that while I was speaking about the apostle Peter this morning, the story was really my own. And that leads to the next surprise.
2. Pride and shame can hold us prisoner, but hope can set us free. This was the central teaching this morning taken from John 21:1-19. Here the apostle Peter is restored to ministry. What was true for Peter was true for me. When I invited Jesus into my deepest wounds, it was a painful process. However, Jesus met me there without any sense of judgment or condemnation, instead he offered love, forgiveness and a new commission. For Peter this meant no more lone ranger antics (like cutting off the ear of the priest’s assistant). For me, it meant diving headlong into God’s movement of justice and mercy around the world. In the end, Peter was a changed man. He no longer retorted to “redemptive violence” but admonished his flock to honor everyone (1 Peter 2:17). Side note: I sure wish there was a lot more honoring of everyone going on by Christians today instead of thinly veiled political rhetoric. I too have been changed by receiving a new commission. For me it is going to mean leaving the “safe” and comfortable confines of a life I built in Turlock (and a church that I love fiercely and dearly… shout out to Monte Vista Chapel) for a new chapter of urban and global ministry alongside North Avenue Presbyterian Church in Atlanta, Georgia.
3. We have good friends here in Turlock. I am realizing as our days end just how much I am going to miss them. There is an unforced rhythm of life that I feel walking alongside them. That is (and has been) a tremendous gift. We are praying that God will provide friendships in Atlanta that are as rich, robust and real as those we have experienced here.
4. My final surprise is this. I would not change a thing. I would not change one moment of how things happened here in Turlock. Sure there are some boneheaded mistakes I made in ministry I would like to call a mulligan on, but if I did that, in some way I wouldn’t be who I am today, walking the road I’m walking. So, I have learned from the mistakes, and promise to not make another community of the confessing live through the same ones (I’ll make completely fresh and new mistakes in my ministry in Atlanta :).
Tonight, some friends are gathering to tell us goodbye and to thank us for our ministry at MVC. But as I see it, tonight our friends are gathering so Lorna and I can tell them thank you for being the hands and feet of Jesus to us.
seadore4 